But I'm excited. Although today was one of the most difficult days of my life in the theater, I'm still thrilled to be there. There were moments when I thought I would lose my composure. When I thought I was done for, and when I almost gave up on myself. I almost stopped trying. I almost broke down... multiple times. But I didn't, and I'm stronger because of it. Charity is a tough role for me, because I feel that she's so unlike me. But lately, I've been feeling so vulnerable and unsure of my future that I'm reading her story and characterizing a person and part of myself that I'm becoming more and more aware of. I won't get into the dirty details, but this girl is... amazing. How she continues to remain optimistic despite her (for lack of a better word) shitty life circumstances is beyond me, but I find it admirable.
Well heya! Who knew I'd be learning something from this "stupid broad."
Anyway, as the past week of my life has been sucked up with charityCHARITYCHARITY, other things have happened to me too! For starters, my exercise regimen is actually staying on track. I go to the gym or for a run every day I don't have a 2-hour or longer dance rehearsal. I also started taking daily vitamins. I found out that Osteoporosis runs in my family, so I'm trying to really stay on top of my calcium consumption. I'm starting major planning for my wonderful single dorm room! I already posted a little sumthin-sumthin for you, but it's changed since then... same idea though... kind of. I'm also drinking a ton of water (Carsan! I learned! - [we were dehydration problem buddies on outdoor ed]). Like I feel like Rachelle because I'm peeing every hour on the hour. It's absurd... and maybe that was a little too much to say. But so I sound like I care? No.
Well... let's see. I'm currently thinking of dying a colored streak in my hair like both of my sisters. I also want to apply to be a Bruin Woods counselor in two summers. I also got my first bank account (zing) and credit card. I'm actually so anxious for college to start, it's absurd. Jake (friend who's going to be a sophomore in the UCLA MT program and is also in Sweet Charity) was teaching me some of the Tai Chi moves today during one of the moments we had where neither of us were doing anything. It was amusing and reminded me of Godspell (oh dear god). Molly and I are potentially going to NYC for five or six days. We're planning on seeing Broadway shows galore, doing the touristy stuff I still have yet to do, frolic through Central Park, Yoga in Bryant Park, maybe some master classes, and general extravagant explorations that only the MollyCaitlynConnection could concoct. I don't think that's a word, but my Mac doesn't put a little red line under it, so I suppose we're on track here.
Anyway, I miss blogging. I miss it and hope I'll do it more often this week.
My show opens in less than two weeks and I am FREAAAKINNN OUUUUUTTTT!!!!
OH, one last thing. I made. the.
most.
incredible.
cupcakes.
yesterday/two days ago.
CHOCOLATE//PEANUTBUTTER.
the frosting was to die for *flips hair* just sayin...
how i feel today:
